Wednesday, January 12, 2011

I got to thinking about something today. 

Why is it I have better, more in-depth conversations with people I (barely) know from common-interest internet forums than I do with people that are supposed to be my friends? 

Some of these people from the forums are people I’ve never met… or have only met once or twice in my life… but yet I know more about what is happening in their day-to-day life than I do about those I see on a semi-regular basis.  I know about what’s going on with their kids, spouses, jobs, interests, fears, etc.  They entrust me with a lot of information, and I feel like I receive a lot of respect.  It’s nice.

But with friends nearby, it often seems that most conversations are very fabricated.  Very scripted.  Very cautious.   It seems that I have to quite literally ‘pull’ conversation from people.  It makes me wonder if there is something that’s being hidden.  Something I’m not supposed to know.  Something they are too afraid to say to me.

The thought bothers me a little.  I make all sorts of efforts to be genuine enough to people I come across, whether it be online or otherwise.  Whether it be something they want to hear or not.  But I don’t think I’m receiving the same in return.